As many of my friends & family know, my relationship with my mother over the years can be described as rocky at its best. Well, in the past few months my mother and I have gotten beyond that and I have learned much about my mother. I have reflected on my relationship with her and come away with a greater respect and love for her.
So what have I learned from my mother over the years? I learned how important family is. I remember growing up always surrounded by extended family. In fact, I have a hard time remembering when it was just the five of us living in the house. From my grandparents, to my aunt and uncle, to cousins coming to the country for summer vacation, and finally to my aunt moving in when her husband died and she needed a home, our home was an open house
I learned how important it was to help others. Even when it meant us forgoing a couple of weeks in the summer time to help the sisters in the convent move to a temporary home so that a new convent could be built.
I learned practicing what you preach: Including trudging a mile through the snow to go to Mass on Sunday even though it was just us & the priest in attendance.
I learned how to be economical: And learned that wealth was neither in the house you lived in nor the car you drove, but rather in the treasures being stored in the heart.
I learned how to be a good wife: Dad and she had a love that only can be found in story books and at the end she was looking forward to joining him in heaven.
I learned to stress education to my children and always be proud of them: Growing up there was no doubt we were all going to college and we were going to graduate (even if it meant finishing after getting married or taking some time off and then going back for that diploma) and in turn my children, Vicki’s children and Tom’s child are all college graduates.
I learned how to welcome grandchildren: & not try to be their mother but just be there for them, with an open house, open arms, open ears & open heart.
I learned that my daughters would bring me sons: Many times I heard mom say that Rich and Bob were the best sons a mother could ask for, (especially when she wanted another piece of furniture moved).
I learned how to love my sister and brother: And not let my relationship with them get lost in my building of a new life and a new family.
My mom was feisty, strong willed and spiritual. She took a back seat to my father in my life (Daddy’s little girl). She chased Tom around the dining table with a broom but never caught him, She planned and executed many birthday parties for us; Baked many cakes, even though Tom once tried to help by adding soap flakes to her batter. Thank heavens she knew Vicki would be staying out of trouble. & near the end she wrote these words:
“As I lay down in bed nights or even mornings, I try to bring my thoughts of my life together. Adolph and I were married 50 glorious years and I miss him tremendously since his passing. I think about all our past years. We had three children and worked to see them in college and are very, very proud of them. They have been very faithful to us and still are to this day making us a very happy family. I love my children and extended family very, very much. I pray that all lifetime for them continues to be happy and Blessed.”